Age of Disposable Friendships

We live in the age where there is a disposable version of almost everything. There are disposable cameras, disposable cutlery, disposable shoes, disposable stationery, disposable packaging, disposable tissue and even disposable underwear. What exactly does "disposable" mean though? Very simply it means to 'you and throw' whatever that is disposable. Use the object for its functionality and once you have exhausted its usefulness you dispose of it. The concept is innovative and new and in line with our fast paced lifestyle of today. However in our obsession of leading a disposable aided life have we made relationships disposable?

Are we living in the age of disposable friendships? Have we gotten so carried away by ambition and by progress and by success that we now view "friendships" as being disposable? Meet a person, realise their potential in getting your work done. Befriend them. Tap into their potential on the pretense of friendship and compassion. Once your task as been achieved and your success has been attained, feel free to dispose of the "friend". Now these disposable relationships come in all shapes and sizes and last for all variety of lengths. They could be your best friend who you grew up discussing wedding plans with or it could be your college friend with whom you shared your all-night study sessions with. The friendship could also last for a few days, a week, a few months or even as long as 4 to 13 years...

Apparently it is possible to be the best of friends for years, to celebrate moments together, to be the first to wish them on birthdays, to be together through thick and thin and yet end up being disposed. How it is possible I wonder... What can motivate a person to stoop so low as to wake up one morning and decide, "XYZ is not my friend any more"? Heck with the friendship and everything with it. Heck with the plans to attend each other's weddings. Heck with the promises to be there for each other.

Maybe that thinking was alright at the age of 5, 8, 11 or even 13. But as a person matures you expect them to understand and value friendships more. It is understandable that a person cannot be the closest of and bestest of friends with every single person. However is it wrong to expect loyalty and pure friendship with people you spent years being "friends" with?

It is amazing to think that for some people disposing a friend is as easy as disposing that used tissue. Take it, use it and throw it. No second glances. No regrets. No remorse. At least the tissue knows it was made for that purpose of being used and thrown. I am quite certain human beings were not meant to be used and disposed. Was the disposed friend at fault for being trusting and open in a friendship? I thought openness and honesty is what made a real friendship. Anyone can put up a facade but then that would not be labelled a friendship, would it?

If you think about it, it is a sad world for those who dispose of friends. I suspect they are actually ignorant of the meaning of friendship and devoid of emotions. They say you only realise what you had after you lose it. But what do you call the person who does not even realise what they have after they themselves threw it away? No matter how the world and people dynamics have changed over the years, no matter how Facebook and its like have "taken over", no matter how busy our lives are, friendship is a relationship that has existed as long as humanity. There is friendship hidden in every relation. There is friendship between a mother and daughter, there is friendship between a teacher and student, there is friendship between a husband and wife and there is friendship between a brother and sister. How is it then that a relation as pure and basic as friendship could become disposable like just another sheet of tissue?

25 years of friendship and love

On the night of 6^th of February 1985 a young man and a young woman got married in front of the scared Hindu fire. 25 years later that couple is still together, bound by their true friendship and love. I feel immense pride in saying that they are my parents. My wonderful father and mother. Captain Sarda Umesh Srivastava and his lovely wife, Mrs Bina Srivastava.

It is heart warming to see how an arranged alliance of 2 people from 2 very different places in India has stood the test of time. They faced their share of life's obstacles and each time their relationship emerged stronger. They survived prolonged separations for years, they survived diverse natures, attitudes and backgrounds and they survived settling down in a foreign land.

Despite these challenges they faced they always were there for each other. They were each other's best friends and they were each other's confidants. 25 years later they are still together and as much in love. They have their own ways of showing it. I always loved how they held hands, gave each other hugs, how they say "I love you" to each other and how they adore each other in their gaze. I love how my father wakes my mother up in the morning with a fresh cup of tea. I love how my mother cooks my father's favourite dishes. I love how both of them go on dates to the movies or to dinners.

Their relationship has been very real and not a fairy tale. That is precisely what I love about them because they made that real tale come true despite the odds. I have learnt that there are problems in every relationship but it is up to us to face them and to grow on them. I would be blessed if I could have a relationship as strong and pure as theirs ever in my life.

I want to wish them all the love and all the wishes for a fantastic silver anniversary. I have not seen a couple as beautiful as them and I pray to god they see many beautiful years together.

Thank you Mummy-Papa for being who you are and for inspiring my life with your love. I wish I was with you today to be part of your special day.